Wednesday, January 23, 2013

A bucket of blessings or anxieties??

Today was EXHAUSTING!!! I began the day feeling very blue and overwhelmed and not really sure why?? I was borderline weepy on the drive in to work. It could be hormones or a direct result of just getting older but I think the feelings of the last couple of weeks have finally decided to rear their ugly head..

I am SCARED... not for any one thing. I'm not the alone or lonely kind of scared because I know that God is always with me and never leaves me. I am afraid of CHANGE...OK, I have said it and out loud even. I like all my ducks in a row and for sameness ( or saneness, whichever applies more). I have always resisted change and it could be a direct result of sometime in my life feeling that things were totally out of my control and my whole life was all about change. You know the rolling with the punches, taking life as it comes kind of change. Maybe because too often change is/was viewed by me in a negative light with all sorts of inconveniences instead of being embraced as an opportunity for new possibilities to present themselves.

I think how much my life changes on a daily basis but those are small somewhat manageable changes. I can't be the scared caterpillar not wanting to burst into a beautiful, colorful butterfly because of all the the changes I would have to go through. Beauty sometimes emerges from change. Truth and reality come with change too. Change is often a result of a failed attempt at doing something so you tweak and search for a better way of doing whatever it is thus creating a changed situation and hopefully even better attitude as a result.

Work causes me enormous stress at times because it is so unpredictable and it is all about change. Daily, hourly and sometimes even minute to minute depending on how that moment presents itself. Sometimes it is the kind of constant change that leaves you winded and wondering what just happened while other times it's like a claustrophobic smothering anxiety. Don't get me wrong, I love my job for the most part and it's manageable but I wonder if I would be any happier if I didn't have to go through so much change on such short notice.!! I'm sure there have been many wrinkles added to my face as a result of some of these daily changes.

I think of others whose lives have been radically changed because of life altering circumstances; ie, health issues, loss of job, car wreck, fire, natural disasters, divorce, death, etc.. How do they cope and deal with these changes? I think of my mom. She has had so many changes in her life in the past three years. She however chooses to stay upbeat and I admire her immensely. She has endured some tough things; breast cancer, the death of her beloved mother (my sweet, sweet granny) and numerous other health issues to name a few. I look to her for inspiration because in my eyes she is one of my heroes. When I think about her my little petty changes in life seem so small and insignificant but when you talk to her she will tell you her changes are small compared to others. I guess it really is about perspective.

I guess it is time to put on my big girl panties ( and not only to cover my bottom) and face whatever comes my way with the strength and dignity that she does. You can't stop change but I guess it's time to stop whining about all the things that seemingly go wrong and the changes that make my days crazy and accept the fact that that's what life is all about. It is what helps us to grow stronger, love deeper, have more faith in others, ourselves and how God is directing our paths for a better tomorrow. Instead of having a negative attitude about change I want to BE THE change I want to see in the world. In order to do that I must embrace life, change and all. 



Monday, January 14, 2013

Brrrr.... I want summer back

Brrr..... That's right it has been downright cold the last few days. Don't get me wrong, it's not like in negative temps with ice and/or snow on the ground but for a born and bred Texas girl... well, it is COLD!!! I have always been of the notion that i would much rather be hot than cold. The cold makes me miserable and I am so grouchy!!! Today I got to learn a new word about winter precipitation. It is grauple and it is snow pellets which is actually a mixture of snowflakes, sleet and fast frozen ice. I have NEVER heard of this word before today or witnessed what it looks like. It looks like dippin dots or styrofoam pellets like what would be inside a bean bag. Very weird looking. 

Disclaimer*** this photo obviously was not taken today. Another thing the cold does is make me lazy... I just want to snuggle in a warm cozy blanket and think of warmer days. This picture was actually taken last SUMMER (oh I long for you summer) at Camp Copass in Denton, Texas. I have been blessed the past several years in being privileged enough to accompany a group of pre-teen students there for a week of church camp. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE it there. This is where the canoeing takes place and is a great place to sit under the trees and enjoy the wind, partial sun and shade. I hope everyone has a dream spot that warms not only your  body, but also your heart and soul. I am comforted this evening by the warmth and love that comes from the Lord. BLessings to you all. Keep warm and relish God's eternal warmth and love for us all. 

Sunday, January 13, 2013


Those who plant blessings shall also harvest blessings. Go be a blessing to someone in life...Smile, Share, Laugh and Love..

Thursday, January 10, 2013

Dreams, Wishes and New Beginnings


I am a dreamer...I think of things constantly that I wish or dream  about doing... Vacations that I would love to take, business ventures that interest me just enough to dream about them without trying to worry about making them a reality, GRAND ideas, and small ones too.

The prospect of a new project is something that almost makes me giddy. The dreaming, wishing and planning that brings you to  the beginning of something new. A blank page in a journal or the cleanliness of a blank white canvas just begging to be splashed with color.

The wrecked remains of last years flowers and container gardens yearn to have a new beginning with new bulbs and seeds all fulfilling the dream of growing into something beautiful.

I have this sign above the bed in our guest bedroom because that room also doubles as my craft/art room and the simple message speaks to my soul. I have many hopes, dreams and wishes. Over the years I have developed the love of baking. I liked it so much that last year I invested multiple months ( 4 to be exact)  not to mention money to explore cake decorating. I actually enjoy it so much that I decided to start my own in home bakery called Fat and Sassy's Sweets. I did a ton of orders last year but not enough to have to claim it for taxes or even enough to make a living at it. Being a dreamer, I can imagine one day owning my own place. Not just a bakery but a place that I can decorate (  since I enjoy that as well) , have art being created in a separate studio or classes being taught, as well as it having a vintage/antique feel to it with a small resale.thrift area but that only offers refurbished items , vintage items or antiques.. Of course bakery items would always be available to all customers for purchase. A place full of conversation, love, compassion and community. I dream of a place where people can come and nourish their creative talents, connect with other people and sit and visit over a cup of coffee and a cupcake or cookie.  I KNOW that this is quite a dream but what does it hurt to dream? We have a little travel/business  trailer that sits at the front of our property. It doesn't have electricity in it and it needs some repairs but I would like to make that into my makeshift craft/art studio until such a time that the OTHER dream can either be made into a reality or let go.... Dreams....Maybe someday but for now I will continue to utilize what I have which is pretty awesome except that I can't leave it too messy in case anyone comes to visit. 

God provides us a new beginning each day. He gives us hope, a spirit of love and a longing to dream of the plans that He makes for each of us individually. I look forward to the breaking of a new day as it gives me the opportunity to praise Him for all that He provides and to dream of all that is possible when we put our faith in Him. 

"For I know the plans  I have for you , declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Take or is that make time to smell the roses

                      STOP and smell the roses

I have often heard the expression take time to smell the roses. In reality taking the time really boils down to MAKING the time.. We use our time so unwisely...
Thing is we aren't guaranteed a specified amount of time. At least not the we have knowledge of. Only God knows the plans he has for each of our lives and the paths that he would have us each travel. Yesterday I asked if you would pray for my mom's. Both had better days today so YAY,  prayers were answered. 

Funny thing though... As I was praying this morning as I was driving ( which is a daily practice since my morning commute is around 50 min to work) I began to not only thank God for the good things in life ( mine , friends and families) but also to thank Him for the trials and hard times too. We want to skirt around those times but just as the footprints poem states, it is then that He carries us. Through hard times he desires nothing more that for us to depend on 
His love, grace and mercy. How many roses are you going to take time to stop and smell? Savor the goodness of God in each delicious, fragrant breath.

The Lord Almighty has sworn, "Surely, as I have planned, so it will be, and as I have purposed, so it will stand." Isaiah 14:24

Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Special people deserve special prayers


                               SHIRLEY (mom-in-law)

Sometimes we just need special prayers for the people that we love. Today I ask for prayers 

my two moms. My sweet mother -in-- law aka THE DOGGY MEMAW is in the hospital after 

a fall. She is ok but needs  to have some tests run and to be kept for observation for a day or 

two. Also asking for unspecified prayers for my mother aka MEMAW. These two amazing

ladies bring so much joy and love to their families and so I lift them up in prayer for God's 

healing hands to make them well. Thank you in advance for all prayers lifted in their names.

1 John 5:15 " And if we know that He hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests which we have asked from Him."

With much love & gratitude,


Monday, January 7, 2013

Of hallways, owls and love..

Well today was the day... That's right it was back to work again after a wonderful two week break. The picture on the left is what the hallway where the classroom that I work in is located. This picture was taken at around 7:40 this morning and as you can tell the halls were pretty sparse at that time. The cute little owl on the right is a stock image I found somewhere out there in internet land. 

Today I am going to write just a bit about what work means to me. I work as a teacher's aide in a self-contained classroom of special needs students. I love my job and the kids are awesome. My co-workers in general are wonderful people but some of my best friends work with me and that makes my job oh so much easier to like. 

I get to make a difference in the lives of children everyday. I probably spend more time with each of them on a daily basis than their parents do. I get to help develop their minds through  educating them but my job goes far deeper than just that. I get the privilege of helping to teach them life skills like manners and appropriateness (believe me that is important in life) , how to dress themselves and to take care of their personal grooming needs. In addition to that I get to laugh with them , make them smile and of course that works in reverse as well , console them when they are upset, calm them down when they are angry, anxious or just plain fidgety , hold them close when they are scared or just need a hug and most importantly love them in a way that they have no doubt that school is a safe place that has people who care about each one of them and that are there each day eagerly waiting for them to walk through the doors.

Our school mascot is the owl and every time our assistant principal does the announcements he always says, "It's a great day  (pause) to be an owl." Today as is the case with most of my days, because of these kids and the relationships that we have created with each one ; as well as the friendships of teachers and other school staff I KNOW that today WAS a great day to be an owl. 

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."  1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Sunday, January 6, 2013


 YAY!!!  I figured out that if I switched my browser I was able to upload some pictures. Soooo. Here are the some of the pics that I talked about in my last post. Hope you enjoy ....

With Love,


Happy New Year, a few days late..

I have been trying in vain to figure out this whole blogging thing. I have spent so many hours online trying to download cute fonts, adorable backgrounds and then today I have tried to apply some of those things and well.... IT JUST ISN'T WORKING!! If you are an old I Love Lucy fan, insert her wailing cry here!!

I can't figure out how to add photos which is the primary reason I decided to attempt this whole blogging thing again... Ughh.... I know it has to be easy but I am at a loss right now. I want to blog about whatever picture I take each day and whatever else strikes my fancy..

Right here is supposed to be a picture of my vintage Santa collection. As we begin a New Year it means that YES, all my decorations must lovingly be boxed away again  for another year. I have many treasured Christmas lovelies..I have collected Santa's for over 15 years and I have all sorts of them. I have whimsical ones that make me laugh, fabric ones , all types of glass ones , lots of different wooden ones and a slew of vintage plastic ones.

I also collect snowmen and gingerbread men/houses. I know, I know... My husband says that I am a hoarder in every sense of the word except that I am not one who suffers from psychological issues where my home is stuffed to the ceilings with trash or anything, just I have a lot of stuff and I have a strange  attachment to it.  That's not to say that if something were to happen ( God forbid) I wouldn't get over it because it is after all just stuff  and material things can't be taken with you anyway.  I absolutely adore collecting all these things though and enjoy keeping my snowmen up a little longer ( till  around the end of February) since they are Winter related and not necessarily only for Christmas. I didn't put up  any of my gingerbread stuff this year.. Some years it is like that and I go through phases. I also did not put up my huge snow village either. I had started to collect the cute little houses several years ago and then maybe two or three years ago my mother gave me all of her houses and accessories so now I have a huge SNOW VILLAGE with a candy shop, multiple churches, bakery, park with gazebo, school, and about a dozen different houses. I have all sorts of people that go with it including snowmen, carolers, kids and parents..

I also have an infatuation with all the ornaments I have collected over the years ( insert another cute  unloaded picture here). I relish in unwrapping each ornament and placing them under the tree while I decorate it as I "look " for just the right place for that special memory to go. I have the first "set" of ornaments that we got the first year we were married almost 28 years ago . A salesman was selling them door to door which is odd to me now but not so much back then. It is a set of a dozen porcelain bells that are in the shapes of animals. I don't remember how much I paid for them but it couldn't have been much. We have the Hallmark sports figures ornaments with the likes of Troy Aikman, Jeff Gordan, Dale Ernhardt Sr. & Jr, Larry Bird, Tony Stewart just to name a few, not to mention the Batmobile with Batman and Robin racing to their next adventure. We have all sorts of religious ornaments from crosses, angels, nativities to ones that were made in Sunday School classes.  All of them holding some special meaning or memory. Of course my recollection of our many ornaments wouldn't be complete without mentioning my most favorite ones which are the handmade ones. I have a sweet little girl made from embroidery floss, felt and a pipe cleaner that I made with my paternal grandmother so many years ago. I also have some that she made me as well. I have some ornaments and decorations from my maternal grandmother as well and seeing as they are both in heaven now, they are precious reminders of love, happiness and all things sweet. I adore all the sweet , cute, messy ornaments that were made by sweet little boys that have turned into men now.. Those are my FAVORITES... Then there are the handmade ornaments that I forced my men into making with me back in 2004. I planned a whole day around making memories and part of that plan was having everyone get creative and make special ornaments. The memories that go with these ornaments come flooding back each year as I unwrap each ornament one by one. 

Of all the things that "say" Christmas to me none has more meaning to me than our Nativity. We actually have several but there is the one that I place over our mantle in the middle of our living space  front and center and in the most prominent place. . I always do the surroundings a little different each year but there is usually gold beads that represent the gold, a little woven basket that I imagine might have held the incense and a small wooden urn that represents the container that would have  held the myrrh. Of course there is also an angel in this setting too. This year I added two things ... I added a small slender tree on one side of the mantle that I made ornaments for. There were 25 ornaments each with a different name of Christ written on it. I also made a banner with 25 pockets to go over the mantle. Each pocket contained a different scripture or  bible reading to prepare our hearts for the coming of the Lord. I so ADORED how it looked but more imporantly reading all the messages each day. I must admit, I did get a little  behind and didn't read each one but close to it.I guess I will have something to look to forward to next year.

As another Christmas season closes and a New Year begins I am excited about the plans God has for me and my family in this coming year. What paths will he take us down, what obstacles might we have to overcome? Just as I anticipate putting out all my lovelies each Christmas season and cherishing  each memory that goes with each one I eagerly anticpate the memories that will be made in another year of serving my Lord.

"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind can conceive what God has planned for those who love him." 1 Corinthians 2:9

Saturday, January 5, 2013

Ponderings of Where the Past 5 Years went...

Oh my!!! Where oh where has the time gone?? Well as you can tell with your very own eyes it has been a whopping 4 + years since I made my last blog entry. I HAD good intentions of blogging more frequently, honest.. but life just kind of gets in the way sometimes. Therefore I decided to revamp this space and create a place that I want to write and that maybe others would enjoy visiting occasionally. My posts will be about random things I am sure because that is the way that my brain just seems to function most days. As we are just starting a new year I decided I wanted to try to blog more and to take time to make something creative everyday. I thought about this and came up with the idea of posting a picture a day and blogging about it. No real themes or pre-conceived notions of great photography but just the opportunity to LIVE and relish the everyday things we so often take for granted. As you can see I am already a few days behind due to my overhaul of this space but will try to make up for lost time and posting a couple of pictures and posts tomorrow. This girl is super sleepy from HOURS of working on this space so additional posts will have to wait until I catch up on a little shut eye.  I hope you will join me on my journey through the next year. May God Bless you until we meet again.